


For Her

by MarzgaPerez



Category: The Handmaid's Tale (TV)
Genre: Angst and Feels, F/M, Late Night Conversations, Love, Missing Scene, One Shot, Survival
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2019-07-06 15:52:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15889191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarzgaPerez/pseuds/MarzgaPerez
Summary: Set during Season 2 (spoiler alert) after June moves back to the Waterford’s to nurse Holly, S2 E12.I’m a sucker for any and all June and Nick scenes. They play off of each other so well.This is an imagined conversation between them about Holly’s birth.





	For Her

The uncomfortable chair. The polished kitchen table. The florescent glow from the light above the sink Rita leaves on every night. Holly’s erratic crying. Serena shushing her and pacing the floor. These are the things that make up my current surroundings.  
  
The side door opens. Footsteps. _Nick._  As soon as I see his expression, I realize he’s happy to have stumbled upon me, but his eyes are full of worry...or remorse.  
  
“June. I, uh...I’m sorry about...”  
  
His voice trails off. I motion for him to take the seat next to me. These are the quiet moments we must steal when the circumstances allow it. For however longer we have.  
  
His hands find their way over to mine. I offer him a smile, giving him time to finish his thought. I have learned this about Nick after these many months. He has a lot to say. I just have to wait patiently for him to say it.  
  
His face grimaces as he begins again, and his voice is shaky. He speaks quickly as if he’d like to get it all out at once. “I left you. I’m sorry. You were all alone.”  
  
I turn my fingers against his. “Not alone. The baby was there.” I move my hands from under his and stroke the sides of his arms reassuringly. Sometimes I don’t think I have anything left to give, but when it comes to Nick, I find a way to reach into an endless pit of emotional energy.  
  
Now that he knows we’re okay, he relaxes his shoulders. “That’s true. But...June. You’re brave as hell.” Nick caresses my cheek lightly, as though I’m some fragile thing, which is the opposite of what he’s just told me.  
  
Resting my cheek against his hand, I draw in a deep breath before I respond. “If you could have seen me though. I was a mess. I didn’t think we’d make it.” As I close my eyes, the still raw memories pass through my mind in an instant. I stop and linger on the feeling of Holly in my arms...before help arrived, and the medics pulled her away from me.  
  
“They had to give you a transfusion. The Commander said there was a lot of blood when they found you.”  
  
“Let me guess. Serena donated to the cause? I probably owe her my life now. But then again, I did just give her my second born.”  
  
Nick cracks a smile, in spite of our sad reality, and I feel like I’ve accomplished something.  
  
“You slept a lot. At the hospital. I came by to see you, but I didn’t want to wake you.”  
  
My thoughts turn back to the moments when Nick hurried us inside that house. I was still shaken from saying goodbye to Hannah. She had to go back to her new parents. _For now._

“Where did those Guardians take you, Nick? That day?”

“The local station.” He sighs and drums his fingers against the table. “I was in isolation until one of the Commanders could get there to interrogate me. I didn’t know how much they knew. I just kept repeating they should get in touch with Waterford.”  
  
I shrug, teasing him. “Did they at least smack you around a little bit?”  
  
“No. Nothing like that.” He almost laughs but then turns serious again. “I was worried about you. I should have shot those guys when I had the chance. Maybe we could have run. Or I could have gotten you somewhere safe.”  
  
_He’s still feeling guilty._ I decide to rub some salt into the wound. Nick can take it.

“There was a wolf, you know. Outside. I was trying to get the car out of the garage.”  
  
He watches my expression intently to figure out if I’m kidding or not. “A wolf?”  
  
“He looked hungry.”  
  
“An actual wolf?”  
  
“I’m just saying...you picked a hell of a place to leave me. I guess you knew I’d figure it out.”  
  
He smiles again, nodding, and rises up from the chair, kissing my forehead lightly. Maybe Eden is waiting for him. Maybe we’re pushing our luck with this midnight encounter.  
  
Before he leaves, Nick leans down to whisper in my ear. “She’s beautiful. I stood guard at the nursery...after Waterford found out we hadn’t tried to run off. Couldn’t take my eyes off of her.”  
  
I squeeze the hand that he’s rested on my shoulder so he knows I understand.  
  
Nick has one more thing to say before he walks out the door.

“Thank you.”  
  
“For what?” I whisper as loud as I can without shifting the silence in the air too much, unsure of exactly why he’s thanking me.  
  
“For fighting. For surviving. For her.”

 _Holly._ Our miracle. She’s stronger than the both of us combined.  
  
“Of course.” But when I blink my eyes, he’s already gone.


End file.
